


Did Somebody Order a Pizza?

by orphan_account



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Blow Jobs, Consent, Face-Fucking, M/M, Meat Lovers Pizza With Extra Sausage, Mentions of Drunkenness, Mentions of alcohol, Porn Without Plot, Twistedmoney - Freeform, because consent is very sexy, blowjobs are dumb to write, i cant write them from the point of the blowjober only the blowjobee, i love taking porn tropes seriously i think theyre SO funny and that humor needs to be use, if only my family could see me now, inappropriate tips to give to your pizza delivery guy, is this sexy? its probably not sexy, okay okay okay hear me out, or i cant write them from the pov of the person getting the blow job, shitpost, shitpost taken seriously
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-05
Updated: 2019-12-05
Packaged: 2021-02-26 03:00:02
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,975
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21686407
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: what should you do when you find out you dont have enough money to tip your delivery guy?probably not this, honestly.
Relationships: Papyrus/Papyrus (Undertale)
Comments: 6
Kudos: 29





	Did Somebody Order a Pizza?

**Author's Note:**

> partially inspired by [this](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=83GLUvSIxIA) vine

It was his last delivery of the night.

Cash couldn’t help but sigh in relief as he parked his moped by the sidewalk in front of the house, double-checking to make sure he had the address right before he sliding his keys in his pocket. As he stepped onto the walk he checked the time. Ten minutes to spare. Thank god, too, because his manager had told him the next pizza he had to give away for free was coming out of his paycheck. He took the pizza out of the warmer on the back, checking to make sure that he had everything he needed before he started up the driveway to the house, glancing at the garden- it was dark out but the light from the porch made it easy to see just how well-tended the plants were- as he stepped up to the door, ringing the doorbell and waiting.

When the door opened he was surprised to see a skeleton.

Monsters weren’t uncommon in this neighbourhood, and the place he worked at specialized in a brand of monster/human food that meant their clientele was expanded beyond that of just those who could process food without magic. Despite that, skeletons were rare, or at least uncommon, in the city.

Cash glanced at the sticker on the top of the box, reading the printed name. “A meat lover’s pizza with extra sausage for… Twist?”

“Tha’s me.” The other had a thick accent, from somewhere that Cash couldn’t quite place. He looked up from the box, finally bothering to take in his appearance.

Attractive, at least, taller than him with broad shoulders and a soft golden magic he could faintly see in his sockets. Or socket, he corrected himself, one of his eyes radiating a spiderweb of cracks from an old injury, the eye in the center of it dark. His own socket gave an almost sympathetic pang, though it had been a few years since he could actually feel anything in it anymore.

Cash snapped himself back to reality, rattling off the price on the receipt before he ended up zoning out entirely. Twist- that was the name on the order, at least- pulled a few folded bills out of his pocket, the papers slightly worn. He counted them out in his head, thumbing over the bills, but let out a quiet curse when he was done.

Twist chuckled sheepishly. “I uh. Don’ got enough fer a tip.”

Cash sighed internally, not letting his frustration show on his face. The last thing he needed was to offend another customer so they slammed the door in his face so he had to pay for their food with his own money. “It’s fine. No big deal.”

The other frowned but handed him the bills, Cash giving him the pizza and counting out the change from his pocket.

“Any more deliveries fer the night?”

Cash held out the few coins, the change clinking into Twist’s open palm. “Nah. I clock out after this.”

The grin that came up on the other’s face was a shock. “Great! Wouldja wanna come in?”

Cash started at Twist blankly, even as the other leaned to the side, setting the pizza box on some unseen table. “What?”

“Ya don’ got anywhere else ta be, and I feel bad fer not havin’ a decent tip fer ya. S’my own fault. Lemme make it up ta ya!”

Twist grinned at him afterwards, words as casual as if they were discussing the fucking weather. It took him a moment to gather a response, mind blanking out for a moment. “Are you offering to suck my dick?”

It sounded ridiculous out loud, the bluntness of it causing heat to gather on his face. Twist shrugged. “Or eat ya out. Whatever ya’d prefer?”

Cash glanced over his shoulder. His moped was still parked on the curb (and why wouldn’t it be? It was a much better neighbourhood than his own) and if anyone asked about the discrepancy in time he could say that he had to get gas, and that traffic was awful. It was a Friday night, after all. Common sense had never been a thing for him, either.

“What the hell,” he muttered. “Why not?”

Twist shifted to the side, obviously making room for him to walk in, and- with a final glance behind him- Cash did. The door clicked shut behind him. Cash looked around the entryway, not able to see much of the house from the front door.

“So,” he said, slinging his hands in his pockets and turning around, “were you seriou-”

Before he could finish Twist leaned forward, pressing their teeth together with surprising gentleness. A spark of magic buzzed against his teeth and- purely on instinct- he parted them. The other’s tongue was skilled, moving against his own. Briefly Cash found himself if making out with delivery people was a common occurrence for the other, but the thought was there and then gone. Twist pulled back, a string of liquid magic briefly connecting them together. His cheekbones were flushed a bright yellow, smile still just as enthused as before.

“Ya still good, sweetheart?”

Cash scoffed, willing the blush on his own face away. “Do you really fucking believe I can’t handle a kiss?”

Twist’s head cocked to the side, grin lopsided and cocky. The look sent a quick pulse of arousal down his spine, more magic welling in his mouth before he swallowed it down. “Nah. Was just askin’ ‘bout  _ this.” _

Twist reached down on the emphasis, heel pressed against the front of his pants. Nothing was formed, not yet, but the touch, lightly grinding the rough fabric of his jeans on his pelvis, made it easy to start focusing his magic there.

Cash cursed under his breath, the end of his words fading into a groan. “Do I look uninterested or something? I’m game if you are.”

Twist snorted, shoulders shaking with a laugh. “Fair ‘nough, I s’pose.”

He leaned back down, just tall enough that Cash had to tilt his head up to keep with the kiss, exploring his mouth as his hand rubbed a little harder against his zipper. The moan that spilled over his tongue when his magic popped into place, pressing against his pants, was swallowed into the other’s mouth. Twist’s hand worked over him through his jeans, squeezing along his length until he got to the head.

Twist pulled back from the kiss, then, and Cash was barely able to stop a noise a protest before the other dropped to his knees, pressing against his hips. The push backed him against the door. Hands played at his zipper, making him even more aware of the pressure of his cock against his pants. The other looked at him through hooded eyes, a question there. Cash nodded slightly, hoping the motion was enough because he didn’t trust his voice enough to speak without a significant waver. Twist grinned up at him, fingers making quick work of the button and zipper, pulling him out of his pants and pumping his shaft slowly.

The air was slightly cold against the heated flesh of his magic, but any discomfort was gone when a warm tongue ran over his slit, lapping up the pre there. The other knew what he was doing, at least, working him up slow with licks over the head of his cock, the other wrapped around the base just against his pelvis, holding him steady. Just before the motions became teasing, not enough, Twist moved forward, mouth taking him in. Cash swore, his head falling back against the door as heat enveloped him, a skilled tongue moving against the bottom of his cock as he bobbed back and forth, fist around what wasn’t in his mouth.

“Ah, fuck,” he groaned as the other pulled back, laving his tongue on the head before sliding back down.

Twist hummed, which just startled another choked curse out of his mouth. “Shit.”

He’d had blowjobs in the past before, yeah, had his own face fucked more than once, and maybe it was a testament to how long it had been since he’d gotten any kind of action or how the latter tended to be the most common occurrence, but the tightness in his core was building embarrassingly quick.

Twist pulled off of him with a wet noise that sent another jolt of arousal to his dick. “Ya gettin’ close?” His voice was rough. A dick in your mouth will do that to you.

Defensive, he grumbled, “I  _ was.” _

Another lopsided grin. Twist reached over and grabbed his hand, pressing it against the back of his skull. “Give me a heads up when yer there, yeah?”

Cash nodded, swallowing thickly as Twist moved back down onto him, head bobbing quicker. When he would pull back his tongue would twist over the head of his cock, giving suction there before he would dip back down to start over again. Cash focused on staying still; even so, he couldn’t help the involuntary twitch of his hips when Twist took him deeper, the tip of his cock brushing against a throat. The pseudo-muscles tightened around him and he swore, the groan fading off into a stuttered apology.

He couldn’t quite tell, but he was almost certain Twist grinned before doing it again, taking him in fully and pinning his hips back against the door. He swallowed around him, slow and repetitive, his throat a fucking heavenly sensation. He tapped on the back of the other’s skull in warning.

“I’m, uh, f-fuck.”

The warning only seemed to make him move faster, tongue writhing against the bottom on his cock as his throat tightened around his head, making the pressure like a wave in his magic all that more obvious. He started to stutter out another warning, but his words cut off when a hand reached around behind him, fingers wrapping around his coccyx, the coil in his gut finally releasing. 

The pleasure rocked like a wave up his body, Twist bobbing on him through his orgasm up to the point where it became painful before finally popping off. The other stood in front of him and vaguely Cash realized that Twist had swallowed. “Tha’ work?”

His voice was raspier than before, less like a smoker and more heavy with sex. At the corner of his mouth was an opaque smear of cum. Twist wiped it up with his thumb and licked it off, eyes drilling into his own. 

It took a minute for Cash to realize the other had asked him a question, and that his pants were still tugged down around his knees. He bent, the typical after-sex embarrasment mixing with the afterglow of a decent orgasm making for an interesting emotion as he pulled his pants up in front of a near-stranger. 

“Yeah. Was, uh. That was good.”

Hardly the most eloquent response he’d ever given, but Twist seemed to find it amusing, snorting at the words. “Glad ta hear it. Thanks fer the pizza!”

Cash stepped away from the door, coughing into his fist before forcing any remaining mortification out of his body. He could drink himself into a stupor off cheap beer when he got home. “No prob.”

He pulled the door open, starting down the sidewalk, but before he could get too far Twist stopped him. Cash turned to see the other scrawling something on a piece of paper before handing it out to him. It was a number, the handwriting messy but not illegible. 

“Give me a call sometime, yeah? Ya had a pretty nice cock.”

With that, and a wink, he shut the door, leaving Cash alone. As he walked back to his moped he tucked the slip of paper into his pocket, wondering just what the hell had happened as he fought the heat on his face.

**Author's Note:**

> come find me on tumblr!!! 
> 
> [SFW tumblr](ollie-oxen-free.tumblr.com)
> 
> [NSFW tumblr](ollie-orgy-free.tumblr.com)
> 
> (just a heads up but i hardly ever post on my NSFW tumblr so dont expect much Content)


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